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| From
long ago a little
girl comes Naked and dirty and covered in sores So very aware of how I appeared But Jesus is there spotlessly clean His robes gleaming white and streaming with light He smiles beckons “Come “to this dirty child Does He want me? Could it possibly be? Yes, He smiles yet again at me He beckons me “Come it, sit on my knee,” There is nothing to hide the awful shame Naked and dirty and covered in sores Surely, oh surely, He doesn’t want me I turned away with tears in my eyes Closer He comes, there’s love in His eyes Drawing me nearer and nearer His hands reach out and nail scars I see Oblivious of dirt and sores uncleaned Draws me to Him till I sit on His knee Now He is crying with love and compassion Not rejecting, disgusted with this dirty child His tears wet His garment and He begins to clean This dirty child, all naked, unclean As I cringe in shame, He washes me clean The tears flow faster, causing me pain As they purge the sores all gaping and raw From head to foot, not missing an inch Slowly carefully not one part is missed The dirt of others and dirt of my own No difference is made - It’s all wiped clean Here on His knees such safety I feel His garment’s white and streaming with light He clothes me now in beauty so bright I can sit up straight, no longer ashamed No need to hide what’s deep down inside The healings begun, new life lies ahead Not easy, not painless but never-the-less Love, Hope and Faith will carry me on. © By Jill Hall |
Lord I come to you
in brokenness I come to You all bloody and torn Just as I am, no veils to hide The damage done, down deep inside Old concepts, precepts all pulled down, Naked confused, helpless, all alone, I fall down on my knees, To receive Your grace, Your touch, Your love, I know You’re there, tho’ my heart is so cold Fearful of what the future holds But even more fearful of staying the same; Not growing, receiving or relieving the shame. The past lies behind the future unknown The present enough with God alone. As I weep at your feet, no presence is felt, But a knowing inside that I’m understood. And much more than that Your tears run down Healing the wounds, all gaping and raw. Though numbness crept over my soul, Seeds of life, liberty, love and faith Begin to spring forth in newly turned earth. Hope leaps eternal, watered by love. Some day the clouds will all roll away The sun will shine on a brand new day. Tearfully, expectantly, longingly, I wait The glow on the horizon is heralding dawn. Jill Hall |
| Days of light and
days of darkness Rise in confusion – their times unknown The old ways were easier, tho covered with shame Freedom illusive – demanding a fight A dying to the old – a resurrection to the new The process is painful, the outcome unknown New depths to plummet, new horizons to see More summits to conquer and valleys explore. A fight from the darkness to walk in the light A struggle for faith, that seems out of reach. My soul is in darkness enshrouded about But light comes forth from the words of His mouth. No presence is felt but I know that He’s there For the words of His mouth are truth to my ears. I cling on in hope for the night to pass. For His face to shine like it’s done in the past But for now it’s the quietness, loneliness of darkness No longer so frightening but covering the shame. Weather the seasons for they come and go, Stand firm on the Rock and learn to grow Let hope spring eternal renewing the soul. Jill Hall |
Who am I? I’m no
longer sure From long years ago, a little girl comes, Afraid all alone Full of grief and sorrow for nobody knows Nobody knows of the guilt and the pain No one shares in the awful shame Yet now not alone, no never alone For one stands besides with tears in His eyes Firmly but gently uncovering the sores Wounds of guilt and pain and the awful shame He opens them up, the poisons released Mingling together their horror uncovered Again and again love’s healing honesty Flushes out lies, the deception of years Lying hidden, not dormant along with the fears Darkness exposed by the light of reality Memories leap back completely unbidden Demand to be faced with courage and honesty Refusing the lies the evil one brings Accepting the truth, hard though it seems Destined for change, reality brings His word is like balm, soothing and cool Also sharp, unbending at times almost cruel Cutting deeper and deeper, I just want to flee But standing right there stark and bare A cross Accept or reject – my choice alone I open my arms, my heart, my life, I embrace my cross, and release is felt Joy leaps up as recognised there Stands my Saviour, my Lord and my God He reaches out takes hold of my cross Carries my burden, His heart He shares, Together we walk, talk, laugh and love Sharing life’s burdens, its pains and its joys. Jill Hall |
| Who can I trust –
friend or foe I listen intuitively to what my heart has to say It’s a matter of choice; a risk must be taken Listening reasoning things from the past Feelings long past, flash into the now Debilitating, crushing, enveloping pain Sometimes inside me I just want to flee Run and hide, escape any old how A wall rises cold within my soul Blocking in feelings, denying the pain A voice echoes forth – an arrow of truth Challenging firm, make a choice, make a choice To suffer for freedom, accepting the pain Grow in the process reclaiming the past The shadows will go in the future at last All will come clean like transparent glass The past lies behind the future unfolding Keep in the process, growing and living Truthfully, honestly, accepting the past The scars are vivid but truth brings its freedom Loved yes, accepted just as I am I come to my Saviour and give Him my hand Like a small child frightened and shy But knowing His love is first pure and kind No hidden agendas, safe and secure With my eyes fixed on Him I step forward Beginning the new journey He will not harm me, He understands Even before me, He has been there Now He can lead me to places unknown For His love and security are now my own To live in it, grow in it till finally All shall be one in His eternal call Jill Hall |
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